WHAT TO DO WHEN WE FEEL LIKE HATING

When something terrible happens in the world, driven by hate, it’s so human to hate back.  But what is that doing to us?  Hatred in our body can make us sick, physically, emotionally, spiritually.  Maybe you don’t know this, but it’s also harmful to our world.  How?  Because our feelings add to the collective consciousness.  And when  mass consciousness is filled with anger and hate, it perpetuates the same.

So what do we do when we hear about heinous acts?  How do we deal with it?  How can we move from feeling helpless to being of help?  During the civil rights movement, Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

So we have to decide, are we going to reach out with love in our own life?  Are we going to have more compassion and understanding  of those close to us?  Or be quick to hate and condemn?  Making the world a more peaceful, loving place begins with each individual.  We need to look inside and admit our own internal violence, whether against our self or others.  Then do our best to transmute it.

Some of us think we’re pretty enlightened and don’t have prejudices.  But what about the “other” group?  The other political party, the other race or ethnicity, the homosexual, the police, the homeless person begging on the street, the immigrant?  Wherever we find it in our self, that’s where our work begins.  Of course, we can also choose to join a cause that seeks peaceful solutions to our world.  Working in a cause alleviates that helpless feeling and moves us toward a more peaceful world.

Now, do I always remember these things?  NO.  I know them, but I don’t always remember.  Until I do, I am simply unconscious.  And at that time, I’m guilty of adding hatred to the consciousness of our world.   When I do wake up, I turn my focus inward and try my best to change what I know is destructive to me and to our world.  What about you?

Check out my book, The Affair: From Breakdown to Breakthrough, A Therapist’s Real-life Journey, for more great tips and insights about relationships. You can buy it on Kindle worldwide from all Amazon websites, including www.amazon.com